Chancellor Party of 3! Braxton's story

You know, God has to hit me on top of the head a lot of times before I will "get it", this is no exception!

Back in 2013, before we started the IVF cycle David and I started to consider adoption, we researched online, spoke to an agency, and talked, prayed, talked and prayed some more about it. At the time David was ready to jump in feet first, ready to get started on everything, I was not so ready. I wanted so badly to be pregnant, to have that experience, to "feel" all the things pregnant women feel, I didn't want to miss my "window" of having a baby by my own body and then regret not knowing what would have been if we had only tried IVF....well now we know lol.

So this last summer we were in talks with an adoption agency, sent all our paperwork in at the end of June first part of July,  had our home study done in early August and we made a profile book for birth mothers to look at and sent those in at the very end of August and then we went on vacation. We had been told by the agency that it takes a year or less to be matched with a birth mom, and our home study was still being written up and was not 100% complete. While on vacation in Florida we were stuck in our hotel room one morning because of a big rain shower that didn't seem to be letting up,  after a few hours I started to see some clearing skies and the sun start to peek out, and I headed down to the pool, I got down there and set up and I noticed I had an email and text from our adoption agency....

They had stated that they had a birth mom they wanted to "present" us to, and sent us her information for us to look over, we stated yes we wanted to be presented to her and then we looked at each other in disbelief! This birth mom happened to not contact the agency again, but wow, to be presented to a birth mom and our profile with the agency wasn't even complete?! Crazy! We get back from vacation and a few days later they stated they have another birth mom they want to present us to, we looked over her information and told them yes we wanted to be presented. This birth mother happened to pick another couple, but stated we were her 2nd choice. But, again, our homestudy was still not 100% complete, our profile with the agency wasn't completed yet, and we had been considered for 2 birth moms already?! WOW!

David and I thought it was a fluke and we would probably have to wait a bit longer before we get another email or text about another birth mom, it was coming on the end of September and we were just trying to plan for the holidays and keep our minds "busy". September 22 our profile on the adoption website was complete for potential birth parents to see, full on photos of us, a "Dear birth mother letter" fun facts about us and all the "basics" about us! We are still thinking that we would probably not get another email/text until after the new year.

September 24th we get a text about another birth mom....my mind at this point is kinda starting to get used to this drill, and not getting my hopes up too high, we look over her profile and decide that we want to be presented to her as well. September 28th, this was the day they had the meeting set up with this birth mom, she came in with the birth father and her 19 month old son to look at profile books and try to pick a family. During the discussions (before they showed her any books) her son kept grabbing our book and would bring it over to her, they would take it back and then time and time again he would pick up our book and bring it to her.

At 4pm September 28th we get the call/text/email that we have been waiting so very long for, she picked US! Wait....she picked us?!?! We were only 3 weeks into the "wait"! How can we already be matched?? She was having a little boy, and was scheduled to have a C-section on November 12th. This also happens to be David's birthday as well. So we have 6 weeks or so to prepare!

Speeding things up a bit in the story, we have a meeting with the birth parents the very next week, the birth father has straight blonde hair and blue eyes, the birth mother has dark curly hair and hazel/brown eyes, the opposite of what David and I are! The birth father kept saying that we were just "perfect" for this baby. We then went to every Dr's appts with her, got to be in the room with her when she had sonograms (she had one at every appointment) got to take home the sonogram photos, just like if I was the one pregnant.

Our families and friends really rallied around us, with in less than 3 weeks we had a crib, car seat, extra base, pack-n-play, changing table, dresser, blankets, diapers, wipes and oh so many clothes that he could never wear everything he has in his closet!!

God says to follow Him, to trust Him, to drop all your desires that you want for you, that what He wants for you is better. That He will provide if you trust Him and follow Him, and my oh my is that what happened!! Between the clothes, diapers, furniture, formula and all the other baby stuff that was quickly filling our house was just God's grace and proof that this, THIS was His hands at work, this was HIS plan, HIS way for us!

It was something that we wanted to keep quiet, and anyone who knows me, knows just how hard this is for me to do, so we told very few family, even fewer friends about it. This was a LONG 6 weeks for me to do that is for sure!!! But, oh the joy and wonderful feeling I got on November 12, 2015 at 2:06 when they rolled this tiny little man into the room that David and I were in, and I picked him up with tears in my eyes, my heart was instantly in love with this perfect, beautiful, gift from our Heavenly Father!

The last 5 weeks has been a crazy wild ride, but I would not trade any of it, I would not take back any of the IUI's or the IVF, the 6 losses, the shots, surgeries, needles, medications, mood swings, heartbreak, I would not take any of it back for the joy this little boy brings us.

All the glory and honor belong to our almighty God He has provided, guided and loved us through it all and by His grace, His mercy, His love we have this beautiful amazing gift. Braxton Edward Chancellor is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen, he has truly blessed our lives!

I can not wait to see where God leads us next, to see if we go through the agency again or if we adopt through the foster care system in the future. What I do know, it will be His will and His way, or we do not want it! Here is a few pictures of our beautiful gift for you to enjoy!!

Love,
Randi

Letting His light guide us!

Sorry for the lack of posts!! So...the rest of 2014 was wild and crazy! Between selling our old house, and staring to build our new house it was a busy busy year!! After we have tried the 6 IUI's and 1 round of IVF and having our 6 babies in heaven, we have decided to have God continue to guide our steps and we are going to start the adoption process! 

The first step in the process is to get the home study done, and then all the following steps through an agency. 

As many may know, adoption is quite an expensive and lengthy process. We are going to be having a garage sale on April 18th, and all the proceeds will be going to our "Adoption Fund". So if you have anything you would like to donate to the garage sale please let us know. We understand that not everyone can help, we are asking for prayers for direction, strength through the process and also pray for the birth mother, whoever she may be, as well as the baby we will adopt. Pray for their hearts and they safety. 

Thank you for each and every one of you for always being there for us, supporting us every step of the way!! We are so grateful for all of you!! 

Praying my next post we have great news!! 

God Bless! 

Randi

Letting go

So I know it has been a while since I last posted! Life has been busy for us, between work, going on vacation and trying to get our house for sale! 

David and I were able to finally get away a couple of weeks ago and really clear our heads after everything. We went to sunny San Diego for a week!! We had a complete blast!! We went to the San Diego Zoo, Disneyland and of course the beach!!! There were seals and sea lions on the beaches in La Jolla where we stayed, they are such neat and funny little animals! Lol I could have spent hours and hours just watching the sea lions! Here are a few pictures from our trip! 

We are getting close to being able to put our house on the market to sell!! We touched up paint last weekend and I have carpet cleaners coming out next weekend- I just need to get a cleaning crew out to do a heavy deep clean and we have to plant more flowers in the flower beds and we are set!!! 

My heart has been heavy the past fee days, I have been doing a tug-of-war with my head and my heart when it comes to the subject of having a baby and such. I think my head has won. I have decided to let go of the idea of me ever carrying and delivering a child of our very own. This has been a very hard thing for me to let go of, since I was a little girl all I have ever wanted was to be pregnant and to be a mommy. 

But I have to let this idea go. We have decided to put our energy and such into adoption. This is no inexpensive thing, it is about 40,000 or more to be able to do. It all seems overwhelming and so confusing. We are asking for some prayers please, prayers for our hearts to continue to follow Jesus' plan for us, for us to continue to listen and follow His guidance. For us to find a way to come up with this kind of money (we are open to fundraising suggestions) and most of all, pray for the birth mother, whoever and wherever she may be. Pray for her heart, and lastly pray that it doesn't take long for her to find us. 

We are not sure when we will start this whole process (it will be after we are done with the new house we know that much, unless something or someone finds us sooner) 

Letting go has been one of the hardest things I have really ever had to do in my life. But, I can not keep doing what I have been, it has taken a toll on my heart and emotions. 

Pray our house sells quickly and we are able to start building quickly!! 

Thank you all! 

God Bless 

Randi 

Next step....

Have you ever wanted something since you were 3? My Mom and Grandmothers will tell you I have asked for a baby since I was 3, not a baby doll, but an actual baby. My mom had a hysterectomy when I was 2, so when I asked her she told me she couldn't give me one, I was confused, so I just kept asking. Every Christmas and birthday when they asked me what I wanted....my reply was, a real baby.

Growing up we went to church every Sunday morning, night and Wednesday night, if my parents could not find me, they always knew where to look first, the baby nursery, that is where I would be, playing and cooing over these beautiful blessings. I always have been drawn to babies, my first real job was working in a daycare with little ones, I was blessed to be working with infants at one time too, it was so much fun playing with them all day.

At the age of 7 I received Christ as my Lord and Savior and was baptized. As the years went on I strayed away from the church, as many do. I still prayed off and on, but had gotten a little too far away from where I needed to be with God. 

 I never imagined this is how my road would go, I never saw myself at 31 and not having a child or 3 yet. But it seemed God has a bigger plan in mind. On New Years Eve 2009 I became pregnant by ways no woman should ever become pregnant, but after hearing the past year that it may be very difficult for me to become pregnant, I decided to push how I became pregnant out of my mind, and rejoice in the fact that I was pregnant. When I would have been about 9-10 weeks along I learned the baby had stopped growing around 6 weeks. I was devastated, how could this had happened? Why would God allow this to happen? I started to lean a little more back into my faith and into God after it all. Not the most idealistic reasoning to come back to Him, but God will use anything to get you back on track.

That August of 2009 I met the man of my dreams! He is everything I could imagine my husband to be. There God was showing me that if I had, had the baby I would have never met David. We started looking into several churches around our house, but never really found one we liked. Once we got married I knew we needed to really start looking and find a church home,In 2012 we found it!! It was just what we had been looking for! As you have all read, in the past 2 1/2 years we have been married, we have had our fair share of heartache, and frustration when it comes to trying to have a baby. With 3 ectopic's and now a total of 3 miscarriage's, our hearts are aching for God to show us mercy and grace.

But that is where I have to stop, God is showing us grace and mercy, He has never left our sides for one min, He has kept us going when we thought we couldn't, His mercy is new every day, and oh how I am so grateful for that!!!


David and I had a discussion about where we go next....we have looked at adoption in the past, but unless we find,  40,000 that will be hard for us to do. Our Dr has made suggestions on what to do differently, and told us that she would not transfer the one that is frozen by itself, we would need to do a whole new round of IVF. But, at this time I'm not sure David and I will try (using Dr's and fertility meds) to get pregnant anytime soon. I think we have decided to sell our house and build a new one!! We need to get our minds off of a baby (easier said than done) If God wants us to have a baby, then He will show us the way! I just have to take it day by day and try to recover and heal, all while giving God all the glory and honor He deserves.

I have had this aching in my heart for over a year now, I have been praying about it and it has been weighing on my mind an awful lot in the past few months. I was baptized as a young child, but as I got older I strayed away from the church, but now that I am back, I feel as though I need to rededicate myself to Christ, that I need to get baptized again. I want to fully surrender to Him and His will for my life, whatever the future brings I know that He is in full control, please pray that my heart finds peace and that I know what I need to do in this situation, I'm not one that likes a lot of attention from people I do not know, and I know as Christians we are called to show our faith and show it loudly to others to bring others to Him. I want to follow His will for my life, and I want to make sure this is something that will only glorify Him.

I know this has been a little random and every where, but I have had these thoughts in my head now for a week and needed to get them out-

Please keep us in your thoughts as we continue to heal and take our next steps in the path that God has for us. Pray that His path is so bright with His light, that every other way is dark in comparison, as we all know, God has to hit me over the head with things before I figure out it is from Him, as I tend to miss a lot of stuff!! lol

I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all of your prayers and support through all of this!! I love you all and can not thank you enough!!

until next time

God bless,
Randi

God's plan is still better than mine.

It is with a heavy broken heart that I'm writing to tell you that as we went to the Dr today for a sono, there was nothing on the screen, she did a blood test and my beta levels have dropped to 69, I have lost the baby. 

Please pray that David and I am able to have our hearts healed, and that God provides His plan for us to see so brightly that every other path is dim in comparison. 

We thank you all for your wonderful and kind words and prayers. God has us in His mighty merciful hands, and He is comforting us. 

Until next time 

God Bless, 

Randi 

God's miracles are many!!

So here is a quick update from then past few days!! 

We got such great news on Saturday with the great rise in my levels, thank You Jesus!! That evening I started some light spotting...didn't alarm me too much. Sunday morning I get up and start moving around, and it starts to get a little worse, so I go lay down and try and relax. By Monday morning it was still around, and I was getting worried (I had called my office a few times by this point, they kept telling me it was ok and normal) I decided to stay home since I work on my feet all day, I drove down to see my mom so she could give me my blood thinner injection, she helped soothe my fears. I had a beta drawn and found out my numbers had gone up to 347!! They had only needed to be at 200!! Thank You Father!!! My Dr decided to switch me to progesterone injections, and wanted to see me Wednesday! 

My Dr's office said that I was on "light duty" nothing strenuous, so Tuesday I went back to work...the bleeding started getting worse. So I went home, full of guilt and stressed out, this morning I woke up and my gut was telling me not to go into work, I was a wreck all morning, not sure why I bothered putting makeup on, I had cried it all off by the time I had arrived at work! I called my Dr's office since I was a nervous wreck, they said that I needed to be on bed rest until the bleeding stops! I had my appt a few hours away, I went home and put mysel in bed until it was time to leave for the Dr's office. 

They draw my blood, then they do a "teaching" lesson with David on how to give me my progesterone injections, since they have to be done in the muscle. I came back home feeling a little more at peace, and put myself back in bed the rest of the day!! 

Well they just called me with my beta levels, they only needed to be around a 700, and they are at a 827!!! Praise You Father!!!! I'm still on bed rest until the bleeding stops, but everything seems to be right on track!! They think it coul be a hematoma on my uterus causing the bleeding, so please pray for healing over that. 

I can not seem to thank my Heavenly Father enough for the miricles he has placed within me, that He is covering, protecting, so that they will be unhindered and unharmed for the next 35 weeks!! He is so amazing, all the glory and honor go all to God, for this is His work, this is His blessing!! 

Thank you all for your continued support and prayers! They truly mean the world to me!! My next appt is next Friday, please keep us in your prayers that everything stays right on track and we see two beautiful strong heartbeats next Friday!! Yes we will be just a happy and excited with one! Lol 

Until next time 

God bless, 

Randi 

My cup runneth over

Hi everyone!!!

Well in true form an fashion David had to fly out for work yesterday. This always seems to happen right when I need him home! Lol

I had my socks ready to go today!! 

I went in this morning for my blood work to see if my numbers have doubled. We had a number of 24 on Thursday so we needed a number of 50 by today. The called just a few min ago and well...they didn't double.....they MORE than doubled!!! They are at 106!!!! I praise you Father, for this is fully to Your honor and glory!!! I am so excited and overjoyed with this blessing we have been given by our amazing Lord and Savior!! 

We go in on December 13th to have our first sonogram to see our little beans!!! 

Please join us in continued prayer over this pregnancy, that The Lord places His mighty hands of protection an mercy over me and these babies, that I will have a good healthy pregnancy, deliver these babies at term, alive healthy and happy, with hearts so full if love for our Heavenly Father!!! 

I want to thank each and every one of you for your constant prayers and encouragement and sometimes a shoulder to cry on when I have had a rough day!! You will never truly know just how much those things mean to me!!! 

I will update soon!! 

God bless, 

Randi